Waiting. It’s a part of life. It’s a big part of life. Would we be shocked to discover how much time we spend waiting? I think so. We wait in line at the grocery store, we wait in line for movie tickets, we wait for documents to download onto our computers, and we wait for the interminable long red light to change to green. We wait at the airport when there’s a long flight delay. We wait for a dear friend who’s always late to show for a lunch date. We wait for the phone to ring with good news about a job. We wait on hold to resolve a billing issue. We wait nine months for our babies to be born. We wait with our kids to catch the bus and we wait for them to return safely into our arms. As they grow into teenagers, we wait up for them to come home from being out with their friends. We wait in hospital waiting rooms searching for a sign of the doctor to tell us our loved one made it out of surgery. The list is endless, is it not? 

The question is, “How do you handle waiting?” Do you pace the floor, or do you find yourself getting angry? Do you keep your eye on the clock or the calendar wondering when the waited object will come? Do you worry until you feel sick? Do you smoke feverishly or drink a beer or glass of wine to ease the anxiety? Do you grab the chips and salsa to calm those nerves? Do you complain to whomever will listen to your rants? I’ve been know to do all of the above at one time or another. But if we spend a good chunk of our lives waiting, then wouldn’t it be wonderful to have a less negative, a less destructive way of dealing with it? And could it be possible that waiting is a good thing?

Waiting involves that special virtue of patience. Have you ever heard the little expression that says, “Lord, give me patience, but hurry!”? Today’s world is a fast-paced one. We have become used to instant gratification. Whatever we need is at our fingertips. But our loving God gives us many opportunities to grow in the fruits of the spirit, one of which is patience. Therefore, we must learn to wait, not only in the physical realm for our many needs, but we must also wait on God to answer our prayers. We pray and then we wait. Where is God? What is taking Him so long? Doesn’t He hear us? Of course you know He does, but whatever we need, we need it NOW!

Years ago, someone I knew treated me very badly. She was in my life for good but it was very unsettling and upsetting to be around her. One day I was ready to write her off, to make a decision to let go of her insults and rude behavior. When I discussed this action with a priest friend, he asked, “If you don’t love her, who will?” I wasn’t expecting this insight and was taken aback by the truth of his question. He said, “You don’t have to be with her all the time, but send her notes and little gifts to let her know you are thinking of her.” I took this advice to heart and did as he said. Twenty years later, this person has finally come to love me and has been so grateful for all that I have done for her over the years. She has grown into a most pleasant and agreeable woman and is absolutely delightful to be around. She is nearing the end of her days and is at peace. I shudder to think what might have happened if I had abandoned her because I felt unappreciated and hurt. The wait was definitely worth it! God’s timing was perfect. He not only gave this person time to become more accepting and grateful, but He gave me many opportunities to die to myself and rely on His grace and strength to love someone who was unlovable. The waiting involved stillness, times of prayer, a daily turning to God for help, trusting that He would give me all I needed to endure. But it also involved actions of love on my part. 

Waiting is a big part of our lives. It always will be. But we have a choice on how we choose to wait. Will we curse those precious seconds that fly by? Will we fret and worry about why things aren’t going our way? Or will we quiet ourselves, whisper a prayer to our Heavenly Father, and trust that He will give us exactly what we need at exactly the right time?


<< Isaiah 40:31 >>


New American Standard Bible (©1995)
Yet those who wait for the LORD will gain new strength; They will mount up with wings like eagles, They will run and not get tired, They will walk and not become weary.

It’s so easy to give someone advice on how they should be hopeful. It’s easy to tell them how much God loves them and cares about them. It’s so easy to say that all will be well, when all is well in our own life. We’re pretty good at giving advice and being there for a friend or neighbor or even a stranger. We can easily console and comfort them. But how about when we’re the one who’s hurting, when we’re the one in pain? Can we believe the same words that we speak to others?

The times when we are struggling are the true tests of our faith. It’s where the spiritual rubber meets the road. Those same scriptures that we give to those entrusted to us are there for us to claim, as well. We can so easily give to others but it’s the receiving part that can be difficult. So what might be the barriers that would hold us back from believing God’s words for ourselves? Are we afraid that we aren’t worthy of receiving God’s mercy, God’s love, God’s healing? Do we believe those promises in His Word are for everyone else except for ourselves?

Pride is a rather sneaky sin. It can be blinding and disguise itself as humility. Pride can make us say things like, “I never pray for myself.” Or "God has other things to think about besides me.” Perhaps we think that we can pretty much take care of ourselves, and if we hurt or struggle it’s because we deserve it. A person with true humility will go before the throne of God and always ask for mercy and grace. One who has true humility knows that on her own she/he can do nothing or be anything. True humility seeks God for the salvation of it’s soul and understands that it has to have God's Hand on it’s life or it will cease to exist. 

God loves you so much that He gave his only begotten Son. He longs for you to receive healing, joy, mercy, and the abundant life. If you are hurting, if you are lost, discouraged, dismayed, ill, depressed, anxious, without a job, without food or money or whatever it may be, the Shepherd leaves the others to go and find YOU and carry you safely back. Do you believe that? That is the truth because it is in His Word. Believe for yourself. Trust that He loves YOU and wants the best for you. That is the real test of faith. 

Prayer:
Lord, I am sorry for the times that I have doubted Your love for me. I am ready to place myself in Your very capable Hands and believe that You will work everything out for my good. Even if things look very bad right now, I trust in Your goodness and place myself in Your ocean of mercy. Heal my woundedness and blanket me in Your protection. I am ready to receive your blessings for my life. Amen

Come Holy Spirit

Recently, while away on retreat, I became increasingly aware of the need for a renewal of the Holy Spirit in my life. I don't know about you, but sometimes I get bogged down with everything that has to be done and the craziness of my life. Things get so busy and my schedule so crowded that at times I forget that Christ dwells within me and that His Spirit lives within my soul. It takes getting away from it all to once again realize that I am a child of the King and that He is truly present in every aspect of my life. Why am I not aware of that miracle every moment? 

A lot of the scripture readings lately have been leading the way to Pentecost. The particular passage that caught my attention was from Acts 2:1-4. 

"When the time for Pentecost was fulfilled, they were all in one place together. And suddenly there came from the sky a noise like a strong, driving wind, and it filled the house in which they were. Then there appeared to them tongues as of fire, which parted and came to rest on each one of them. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in different tongues, as the Spirit enabled them to proclaim."

How powerful! Have I forgotten that this same power is available to me right now? Do I really believe that the Holy Spirit can and does come down on me in a very real way to enable me to live out God's desire for my life? I know for a fact that I can do nothing on my own. It is only through and by His Spirit that I can speak a word of encouragement, can touch the heart of someone who is hurting, can heal the sick, sing and praise God, can walk, talk, breathe, etc. etc. Jesus said in John 14:12 "...Whoever believes in me will do the works that I do, and will do greater ones than these..." 

I know that I need this Presence in my life. Perhaps you have that same longing. Sometimes we all feel weak, afraid, lonely, sick, lost, distracted, angry. We are busy, distracted, preoccupied, searching for some kind of relief from the stress of the things of this world. We are human, flesh and blood, and our bodies suffer from the demands placed on us. But we also have the Divine within us. At our baptism we received the Holy Spirit. The Spirit of God! Our Creator gave us this marvelous gift to help us in our every need. 

A friend found something that I had written a long time ago and just gave it to me. The words prompted today's meditation. I want to share it with you.

In Every Need

Holy Spirit, my Light, my Life, my Love, my Strength, be with me now and always.

In all my doubts, anxieties and trials, 
*Come Holy Spirit!

In hours of loneliness, weariness, and grief,
*Come Holy Spirit!

In loss, and in disappointment,
*Come Holy Spirit!

When others fail me, when I fail myself,
*Come Holy Spirit!

When I am ill, unable to work, depressed,
*Come Holy Spirit!

Now and forever, and in all things,
*Come Holy Spirit!

Let us be open to allow the Holy Spirit to come to us, to fall afresh on us. Let us expect the fire of His Spirit to make our hearts ablaze with His love, as it did on the apostles on that first Pentecost. Let it burn away self-doubt, fear, and the desire for things that the world gives. May our hearts be set on fire for those things that are unseen and that last forever. May it empower us to do His will with hearts filled with courage and conviction.

Glimpses of Heaven

A long time ago when my youngest son was a little boy, I used tell him that before he came to us, he was in Heaven with God. One day I playfully asked him if he remembered anything about being there. To my utter surprise, he began telling me in all sincerity that he loved playing with the angels and that it was so beautiful there. It was such a precious thing to say, and I began to ponder his innocent words. It caused me to think about the Scripture that says, “Before you were born, I knew you.” I wondered if my little one had experienced the presence of God. What an awesome thought! When he got a little older, I asked him the same question about Heaven and he looked at me with a puzzled expression. He had forgotten. 

Young children are so pure and relatively untouched by the world. They are simple creatures with a basic need to be loved and cared for. They have no worries, no concerns, no responsibilities. They respond to their mother’s smile with delight and hold tightly to their daddy’s hand when they venture out into the world. Their world is secure because someone loves them. As they get older, life becomes more complicated. They experience rejection, heartache, illness, sadness, confusion, loss, and troubles of every kind. Life becomes hard and sometimes very painful. “Playing with the angels” is nowhere in their memory.

We were all once little children. We began this life as a gift of Love from the Creator who “knit us” within our mother’s womb. Our souls were created by the Divine One. By virtue of our baptism, we carry within us the Holy Spirit who inspires us to call out to our Abba. But what has happened to all of us? Have we forgotten who we are and where we came from? Are we aware that we are the apple of His eye, that we are precious in His sight, that He has numbered every hair on our head? We may at times feel detached from our Father in Heaven, but we are, without doubt, closely connected to Him. The Lord our God has not forgotten us, and I believe that He reveals Himself to us each and every day. But have we gotten too old, too cynical, too immersed in the world, too preoccupied, to see God’s Presence in our daily lives? Are we missing the glimpses of Heaven? I assure you they are there!

One day I woke up quite early in the morning while it was still dark outside. I made a cup of tea and then went to look out my back window. In the distance was the most amazing sight. The tops of the trees were brilliant with light. The sun was just beginning to rise and the light was shining only on them. Everything else was very dark. I was stunned at the sight. I went quickly to the front window to see if I could see the sun coming up but it was still too low on the horizon. I went back to watch the trees all aglow but it had already vanished. It was but a moment of grace, a quick glimpse into the beauty of Heaven. I thanked God for allowing me to see such a spectacular sight and I realized that I need to become more aware of these “glimpses”. 

Lord, open our eyes to see that You are there, that You make yourself known to us in so many different ways. You reveal your majesty, Your personality, Your love for us through Your creation, through Your Word, through the encouragement of a friend, through the smile of a stranger. Help us to become more like little children so that we can be filled with joy and awe and wonder at the gifts You give us and the many ways You remind us of where we came from…..and where we are going.

Please share your own "glimpses of Heaven".

Have you said "Alleluia" today?

One of our Easter songs begins with the words, “The strife is o’re the battle done…” Such a joyful song and so many “alleluia"s voiced. But those words might be hitting a painful chord within us today. Yes, it is the Easter season within the Church, but we as the body of Christ continue to carry the cross. And many times it is a heavy cross. Why can’t we have the victory now? Why do we still have to see so many suffering? Why do we feel such sorrow in our hearts for those friends and family members who are struggling? It’s Easter, after all. Lent is over. We are supposed to be a joyful people, are we not? Then why might our souls feel downhearted during this joyous time within the Church?

Christian living is definitely not for the faint-hearted. This path we have chosen to follow is not an easy one, to be sure! But St. Paul tells us that we must be a people dressed for battle, a battle not against flesh and blood as he says in Ephesians chapter 6, but against the powers and rulers of this present darkness. These unseen forces cause us to feel discouraged and weak, powerless and fearful, angry and resentful. Many wonder if their life has purpose, giving into a spirit of hopelessness. 

So the question becomes, how do we remain strong, courageous, and yes, even joyful in the midst of these difficult times? Well, first of all, we must acknowledge that the victory has already been won. That’s the promise and the hope of Christ’s resurrection. Christ shed His precious blood and died for all and rose from the dead to give us hope of eternal life. And then He commissioned us to continue to fight the good fight of faith. But sometimes, as a “soldier”, we become weary, frustrated, tired of waiting for the “war” to be over. What is St. Paul’s answer to this? He says, “Pray at all times, on every occasion, in every season in the Spirit. Keep alert and watch with strong purpose and perseverance, interceding in behalf of all the saints.” (Amplified Bible)

Prayer; it is a simple thing, yet so very powerful; a conversation with God, telling Him everything in our hearts, speaking with honesty about what we are enduring, and then listening with great care to what He may wish to speak to us. Our God, who knows us through and through, hears our every utterance, our every sigh. His Heart is filled with great love for us and He longs to bless us with His gifts of peace, joy and healing. This time of prayer will be the source of our strength, will be what enables us to live life with a greater vision, will ultimately help us to sing out with conviction those Easter alleluias even in the darkest of days. 

Perhaps if we haven’t experienced the joy of Easter, we should take some time to spend with the Lord in prayer. Even if we can’t find any words to speak, if we let him into our hearts, the same Spirit which raised Jesus from the dead will come and restore each of us to new life. Then we can truly sing with all our hearts, "Alleluia!"

The Final Countdown

Where did Lent go? I am amazed that we have already entered into Holy Week. Every year about this time, I begin to have regrets about how I could have better spent these past 40 days. There was so much I wanted to do, so many things I needed to work on. As usual, it seems I have missed the mark and squandered many opportunities to improve the state of my soul. Could I have spent more time in prayer? Could I have been kinder, more compassionate? Could I have held my tongue and just nodded my head in understanding instead of giving my opinion? Could I have been a better listener, attended Mass more frequently, and so on. Of course, the answer is “Yes”. I lament as I wonder how I let this precious time get away from me. But God, in His infinite mercy, reminds me that I have one week left to do those things that I longed to do to draw closer to Him. 

I am reminded of the laborers who came into the field at the last hour and received a full day’s wage. When you’ve worked all day it seems unfair that those who come at the end of the day should get the same pay. But when you are the one who comes late, you are so grateful to be paid the full wage. What a merciful God we have! 

It is late, but Lord, I come. I long to labor these final hours. I need your grace to guide me through this holy Week so that I can stay awake with You, walk the Via Dolorosa with You and sit beneath the Cross alongside Your holy Mother. May my heart rejoice with all those who have worked hard this Lent in drawing closer to You. Thank You for Your merciful love which assures me that I will reap the blessings of Easter.

It seems only fitting that I should begin this series of reflections, meditations, and prayers as we enter into Holy Week. For it was many years ago on Good Friday that I made a decision to put God in control of my life. Prior to that, I had been only half-heartedly seeking the Lord, and I wasn’t really sure how to make progress on a spiritual journey. 

I was mid-way through my second pregnancy when I developed a condition that was potentially deadly for the child I was carrying. The fear of losing this baby, whom I had already grown to love, was nearly paralyzing and I could do nothing but place my situation into the Hands of God. I remember that I made that prayer of surrender with a most sincere heart. The months that followed were life-changing. Doctor directives were to have total bed rest. The problem with that, however, was that I had a very lively two year old son and I was in a new city with no friends or family to help me. My husband had a brand new job and I wondered how we would get through the five remaining months of the pregnancy. But God heard my cry for help and he sent “angels” to assist us. Women from the church I hadn’t yet had a chance to attend, came to help with housecleaning, cooking, and caring for our young son. They brought spiritual books and many words of encouragement. I read scripture for the first time in years and found the passages amazing, as if I had never heard them before.

One day a woman called and asked if she could come and pray over me. I didn’t really understand what that meant at the time, but I knew it was something good. Connie came and it felt like we had been old friends. She was funny and we had much in common. I felt so comfortable in her presence. Then she prayed from the Gospel of Mark, chapter 5, the passage about the woman with the hemorrhage who touched the hem of Jesus’ garment and was healed. The words became very personal, as if written for me. I was the woman with the hemorrhage, and Jesus was next to me. And then, as Connie prayed, I felt the baby move. That was not unusual, of course, but it felt different.

That night I was healed, although at the time I didn’t know it. All I knew was that the hemorrhaging had ceased. Two weeks later, I called my doctor, and after examining me, he said I could get out of bed and resume normal activity. When I told him what happened with the prayer, he said I had had a physical healing. I delivered a healthy baby boy right on his due date. 

Since that amazing experience, I have witnessed many personal healings within my own family and with many others. Sometimes they seem like everyday occurrences. I believe that God longs to touch His people and heal them. The Scriptures are filled with the loving touch of Christ curing the many ailments and diseases of the people. He is the same yesterday, today and forever so His word is relevant for us right now. 

We all are wounded in some way, either physically or emotionally or spiritually. God is longing to make us whole. We just need to place ourselves into His loving Hands and surrender our personal situation. Let Him have control. Trust that He knows what is best for your life. 

May you receive His love, joy, peace and healing during this Holy Week. God bless you!